Under cover

While driving this morning, Van Halen’s version of “Pretty Woman” came on the radio. It’s a song I liked when I was younger, but hadn’t heard in a while, and I was surprised at how flat and uninteresting it sounded.

The original Roy Orbison version is full of angst and an electricity provided by Orbison’s delivery, his warbly tenor (or baritone — some say it falls between, though I am not the right person to say), the slight stutter in his voice, the perfect timing.

Van Halen’s, on the other hand, is mostly bombast — big guitars filling every nook and cranny, David Lee Roth’s vocal riding the guitars, but lacking nuance, lacking a sense of urgency, seeming perfunctory, as though he were reading it aloud without considering what the words actually mean. Basically, it lacks the pathos of the Orbison original without adding new shades of meaning or feeling. (Plus the video — above — is absolutely dreadful.)

I know this won’t be popular with the Van Halen’s fans — I’m not a VH fan, though I do like some songs — but the first thought that came to mind was why not play Orbison? The answer has to do with the narrow definition of “classic rock” employed by commercial radio (I’ve made this point before — though that’s a discussion for another day).

The other question the song raised is this: What makes for a good cover song? What is it about “Jersey Girl” by Bruce Springsteen, “I Wanna Be Your Man” by the Stones or “Heard it through the Grapevine” by either Marvin Gaye or Credence Clearwater Revival that makes these songs as good or better that the original recordings? All of these are good songs — structurally, lyrically, rhythmically, melodically — but great songs do not necessarily mean great recordings. Rod Stewart — in his late-career rebirth as crooner of the American songbook shows. (I find his lack of connection to the songs he sings baffling, considering his brilliant covers of Sam Cooke and others when he was younger.) and there are examples of lesser, sometimes terrible, songs being recorded and turned into good recordings, because of the interpretation (Fountains of Wayne’s take on Britney Spears’ “Baby, One More Time,” for instance).

There is no one thing that makes a cover song a good song. Covers can stay close to the original or venture into new territory, can pay homage or be completely consumed. For every reworking — think Joe Cocker doing The Beatles or Adele singing Bob Dylan — that creates something new, there are others — The Smithereens song-for-song, note-for-note version of Meet the Beatles — that works just as well.

I think what makes a good cover is the same thing that makes any recording worth listening — the transfer of creative energy, emotion, a sense of purpose. It is a somewhat amorphous concept, I admit, and it is tied to individual taste — which brings me to the reason I am writing this. Here are a few of what I think are the weakest covers you will find, in no particular order  (with some help from this site and this one):

• Manfred Mann’s Earth Band, “Blinded by the Light” — teenage angst on the Jersey Shore turned into bloated space-ship nonsense. (Cue the hate mail.)
• Manfred Mann, “Demolition Man.”
• Van Halen, “Pretty Woman” — see above.
• The Police, “Don’t Stand So Close to Me (Greatest Hits version)” — after a failed attempt at reuniting, the band issued a greatest hits package that included one new track, a soft-rock-snoozer version of one of their most sinister songs and, sadly, a preview of the worst of Sting’s solo career.
• Power Station, “Bang a Gong.” Ugh.
• Mick Jagger and David Bowie, “Dancing in the Streets” — what happens when you put two of the greatest vocalists in music history together and have them sing a seminal Motown track? Well, it shouldn’t be this.
• Peter Frampton, “Signed, Sealed, Delivered” — do I have to comment?
• Motley Crue,”Smokin’ in the Boys’ Room”
• Aerosmith, “Come Together” — as good as Earth, Wind and Fire’s “Got to Get You Into My Life” is on the generally awful Sgt. Pepper’s soundtrack, that is how bad Aerosmith is on this song. You can add almost any other song (Peter Frampton, again?) from this soundtrack to the list, by the way.
• Rod Stewart, “Downtown Train” — I didn’t like the Patty Smyth version, either, but that had a little bit of juice. This is just dreadful — worse than his take on Otis Redding — and offers as good an example of Rod the Mod’s clueless late-career interpretations.

I could find more. And there are some on the above lists with which I disagree — I love Bruce doing “War” and don’t have a problem with the R.E.M. cover. Consider this a starting point. Please weigh in, here or on my Facebook page.